Here are some “facts” about our situation: living in a hotel in Thailand.
1. No weekends. No holidays. Hotels are “open” non-stop.
2. You have a bathroom with wild cherry amenities.
3. You cannot cook for yourself since you do not have a kitchen.
4. Chefs take your order over the phone if you dial 42.
5. Do not take things for granted. Cheese is expensive. So our apples.
6. You never ask: “what day is it?”. You ask: “how busy is it?”
7. You have to call for help. Even if your toilet is clogged.
8. Geckos are everywhere. They are harmless. They are more talkative late at night.
9. You see fire works every day. There is always something to celebrate.
10. You take your shoes off. This is Thailand and this is the way to be respectful.
11. “No sugar”. One must learn this.
12. “No spicy.” One must learn this also.
13. If there is rain you will not see your ankles.
14. You do not have a window. You must keep the doors shut because of bugs.
15. You sleep naked.
16. You dress up properly when staff knocks on your door.
17. You put your hands together when you greet someone.
18. It is polite to say “khun” before you say the person’s name.
19. You can be playful but NEVER make jokes about the Thai king.
20. What do I mean by “playful”: look at how I was dressed here…