My Biggest Conflict With My Son Is…


I do not HAVE TO start by stating that Zoard is easy to get along with but it is true that explaining to him things and distracting him when needed works pretty well on him so we do not have mayor conflicts about food or when to leave the playground.

People used to tell me “I have never heard him cry”. Well, I am a yes man and it is my job to be super sensitive to others when I wish to be…

The problem we are facing is that he finds it very difficult to do something without mammy or daddy.

I am an extremely needy person so I understand that it is great to be around your loved ones but we are at the point where I feel that if he would be ten percent as needy as he is now, I would feel much much better in my shoes. And this has been going on for a long time now so it shows that I was able to live with his neediness because our lifestyle encouraged him to be this way, plus as I said, I get it: it is very nice to share all your excitements and challenges with the ones you love the most…

It is just the two of us nice since a week ago my husband left to Thailand so I thought this is the time to make a change. I wrote my diploma in assertive behavior so I do not necessarily find it hard to say no to others. We have done quite a few sleep training so I think my heart does not brake anymore when Zoard starts crying.

I dislike the sound of loud crying, that is probably nothing new to say. But now Zoard is starting to lose his voice and it is so tough to do this that I am writing about it! HAHA

You treat laryngitis by plenty of fluids and resting the voice. I could easily say, I will do this training or whatever we call it some other time. But there is always something that comes up with us. Many times I try to protect him from frustration because well “we just moved”. But we moved more than ten times in the past months.

Now that I do not have housekeepers, chefs and engineers help me out, it is extremely hard to do any house work with a toddler who gets super irritated by the fact that I do not go and play with him. I try to engage him in whatever I do and that works for a certain amount of the time. But taking a shower or having a phone call is on the devil’s list if you ask Zoard.

In respectful parenting one technique is to sit by your child and just observe him playing. You can also use a type of mirroring language like for example when he says big truck, you do not say good job, you say that is a fantastic red huge truck and I saw that you even put a siren on top of it. This should help the child internalize a little monologue that he will be able to do by himself later on.

So maybe I should just stick to this and not throw Zoard in deep water when it makes him beyond upset causing his laryngitis to get worse.

Luckily I do not feel self-pitty but objectively I can see that it is not normal that I can hardly sit down to eat or go to the toilet. These are your problems when you have a newborn!

I did have a mini success today so I quickly took a picture.

I personally think that mini furniture and mini objects that help young children copy the adult world is really good! We use my nursing chair’s stool as a mini table and sometimes Zoard has a snack on it. And in these cases I do not have to be an arm away from him.

SONY DSC

Do not hesitate to leave a comment!!!

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7 thoughts on “My Biggest Conflict With My Son Is…

  1. I can only imagine your situation as I haven’t had any children yet. It must have been a huge change for both of you when moved away from Thailand, and had to redevelop your time schedule. Good luck, dear 🙂

  2. I have had many days where I felt at my wits end about being able to entertain Z while accomplishing all the many other tasks that are my responsibility. There are good days and bad, but in the end I know that Z is happy and healthy. Thats all that matters.
    Are you still in Barcelona? Or back in Samui?

  3. I like what you said about respectful parenting and mini furniture – that is also what we try to do. As for neediness – he has that too. I guess they will outgrow it eventually.

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